• Who would win in a girly fist-fight, Christ or Satan?
  • Could you make yourself known by burning down my entire block?
  • Is it righteous to fart on the unconscious? What would Satan say?
  • Am I going to hell for deliberately farting during funeral services?
  • Why the hell is my mother so hairy? Could you please tell her to shave? She’s beginning to scare the neighbors?
  • Why does my butt bleed when I try to take a crap?
  • Why is life completely devoid of meaning?
  • Could you please show me pictures of Dick Cheney butt-naked? Please etch these images into my mind’s eye for all eternity!
  • Satan, would you like to come to bed with me?
  • When I die could you please tell my family that I hate them all and that I’m glad to be rid of them?
  • When exactly is the world going to end? Will I be sent to hell if I’m caught pleasuring myself the moment all hell breaks loose?
  • Could you please provide me with a list of all of the ex-presidents Satan has slept with?
  • Is Satan really that gay? If so, is this the reason God hates gayness so much?
  • I want to die right now, is it possible you could send the Grim Reaper to my door ASAP?
  • Could you give (person A) a pecker sore on behalf of the Westboro Baptist Church?
Categories: FAQ

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